Story from Grimm’s Fairy Tales by Jacob & Wilhelm Grimm
A young princess who is enamoured with a bouncy ball loses it in a well, a talking frog appears and right off tells her that if she loves him with a few conditions - in his favour, she will get her ball back. This princess thinks for a minutes about the situation, realizes this frog is in no way to escape the well but the drive for this ball convinces to agree to the frog’s request. The frog then fetches the ball and returns it to her, she then runs back home leaving the talking frog behind.
How expensive or valuable is a bouncing ball in 1857? [The 7th edition of book] Assuming that is the primary reason for the princess not wanting to part from it. Any rational person today with a bouncing ball after it went down a well would be annoyed and a little upset over the loss, but would move on and not agree to a verbal contract under duress. This is a princess in the story, so access to a bouncing rubber ball would be within possibility of replacement.
Access to natural rubber was largely limited to English colonial powers and colonies around this time. In 1848 Dr. Robert Adams Paterson invented the gutta-percha ball made with sap and leather for a golf ball, an improvement on the current leather and feather technology of the time. The patent on a rubber ball was in 1844-1855 by Charles Goodyear & Nathanial M. Hayward. In 1898 B.F Goodrich Company had the rubber materials to make a bouncing ball and became the Haskell golf ball filled with balata sap which is soft. Also, the game of ping-pong/ table tennis was known to the elite Victorian English in the 1860s.
With the access and utility of a rubber and bouncing ball in the 19th century in mind, the reason she highly valued that ball was due to it being a rare thing to (possibly) have. Having a highly valued possession opens up the possibility of manipulation by the frog. This frog placed the princess into duress by stating demands in a quid pro quo situation, this is manipulation.
Using psychological manipulation tactic: Let the other person speak to find weakness, the frog lets the princess talk first.
“Whilst she was speaking, a frog put its head out of the water, and said, ‘Princess, why do you weep so bitterly?’ ‘Alas!’ said she, ‘what can you do for me, you nasty frog? My golden ball has fallen into the spring.”
Letting others speak first is a social norm and is considered nice, but this frog uses this an opportunity to manipulate.
The next day the princess is having dinner when there is a knock on the door, it is the voice of the frog tell her to open the door. The frog reminds her of the verbal contract she agreed to, she shuts the door being frightened. Her father, the king inquires to what is the cause of her fear and learns about the frog. The king tells his daughter that since she gave her word, she must keep it. The princess is coerced into letting the frog in and the frog starts making demands on where to be placed and to eat off of her plate. After eating, the frog commanded to be taken upstairs and placed into her bed. In the morning the frog left but only to return at night to repeat the process a third time, but this 3rd morning there as a prince staring at her while standing at the head of her bed. The prince informs her of the spell that made him a frog and then wishes she marries him, she says yes, as the riches of beautiful horses wins her over. Her new father-in-law hated this relationship so much his heart bursted and died, but they moved on with their lives happily ever after, the end of this story.
The text in the book has “I told him that he should live with me here, thinking that he could never get out of the spring [.]”. Note that the words “I told him that he should live” is used when that is not the case, the princess only agreed to the frog’s terms, she did not stipulate any of them. Nice way for the author to victim blame the princess.
What father says okay to this? A talking frog demands things from your daughter and the king is not bothered at all by it, her obligations to verbal contract is more of a concern than her safety and well-being. Having a talking frog jump around your castle and eat off of your fine dinnerware, make demands of your daughter is also a normal thing.
Regarding the frog sleeping in her bed, “the princess, though very unwilling, took him up in her hand, and put him upon the pillow of her own bed”. Another example of duress for the princess. This only gets worse, as this frog turns into a prince and stares at this teenager next to her bed. This man tells her some vague heartbreaking story of him needing to sleep in her bed and eat off her plate for 3 days in order to break this charm. After immediately telling her this, he wishes she marries him and live in his father’s kingdom.
This princess was manipulated into this verbal contract, coerced into taking in this frog and having it in her bed, only to have this frog become a man next to her while she slept. Then upon having this complete stranger in her bed staring at her, she did not yell, but rather she listened to this backstory to manipulate her feelings and listening to him stating that he will love her. After being emotionally manipulated she agrees to marry this stranger, and him being a rich prince with horses wins her over, no doubts at all.
Ths story is horrible, the princess is the victim and is manipulated. The frog and her father succeed in making the princess feel guilty about obligation from her verbal agreement. The frog repeatedly knocking on her castle door is the foot in the door tactic to manipulate others and is harassment.
Having a female character being at the mercy of male characters is hardly a worthy fairy tale to tell kids.